Subject: He won’t honor my husband’s memory
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a 47 year old woman and I’ve been dating my soulmate for the past 8 years. We could not be more perfect for each other and we have blended our children and lives together in preparation for marriage. I have two children from my husband, who died ten years ago. He has one daughter from a previous relationship. He’s 49 and has never been married, so he can’t wait for us to make it official. There’s one thing that’s holding us back… He wants me to erase my husband’s memory from my mind. I have a family picture in my living room on a bookshelf. He says it’s not appropriate for it to be there, if he moves in with me. He also doesn’t like that my son, who’s 21, kept a good amount of his dad’s clothes and his coats, to feel close to him. My boyfriend thinks all memories should be erased. My daughter is 17 and for her 18th birthday, I planned to give her my diamond wedding ring from her father, along with a few other trinkets I was holding on to. I sent the jewelry to be cleaned and my boyfriend picked it up for me. He found out what the items were and he had a fit, saying I keep holding on to memorabilia from a man that’s long gone. My heart was broken because the man I’m with now is my everything but he’s stressing out about a man that poses no threat to him or our relationship. I have suggested we start fresh with a new home but my home has acreage, a pool and it’s on a lake so he doesn’t want to sell my home. He’s really upset now because my former sister-in-law came to town and stayed with me for 2 days so she could spend time with my children. He hasn’t spoken to me in a week and I can’t live like this. What am I doing that’s so wrong?